snippet of my thoughts…

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No doubt it has been a hectic past nine weeks what with juggling schoolwork, attachments, council, church commitments, external activities and whatnot. Yet admist all the myriad of responsibilities that i have to carry on my shoulder, i do find the entire process extremely meaningful and self-fufilling. It seems, as though given ample time, i am able to slip into the roles that i have to play, be it a council member, a struggling student or an aspiring physiotherapist.

Thinking back, during semester one, i struggled with myself, not seeing the relevance of what i’m doing in school had to do with clinical settings and what i will be doing in the future. I felt disorientated, unmotivated and at times, frustrated with myself. However, such feelings rapidly subsided after the one week attachment we had during september break.

The clinicals that we had was indeed truly an eye-opener experience for me. I was given the chance to experience firsthand the various working environments of a physiotherapist at different divisions such as cardiopulmonary, musculoskeletal, neurological, oncological, private clinical settings just to name a few. It struck me how vastly different the behaviour and attitude of physiotherapists towards patients are and how impactful the socioeconomic status of one plays a part in.

What i have learnt and witnessed firsthand definitely acts as an inherent motivation as well as a deterrence to how i would treat my patients in the near future. Should there be a day when i do feel tired of what i’m doing, i hope i can take a step back, re-ignite the passion and never forget what i set out to achieve, the principles that i hold close to my heart.

On the downside, i do have days when i feel so inadequate, so insignificant. There’s so much that i don’t know, so much more that i have to learn, such a long way that i have to go still. Then again, one does not develop and become a physiotherapist overnight. For some, it takes an entire lifetime to learn and grow into it. Patience, it seems, is the true essence.

Personally, for me, i do have this constant weird habit of setting short terms goals, aims, achievement whatever you call it. It keeps me on my toes, keeps me in check, keeps me in place. It does not matter whether you have achieve your aims. In the case that you don’t, you can at least review and improve on your weaknesses. It beats having none at all because at the end of the day, you don’t even know where you stand, what you are truly living for, for you are merely going with the flow of each passing day.

For sure, it hasn’t exactly been an easy nor smooth sailing journey, but i know i will reach the light at the end of the tunnel and more importantly, during the course of finding myself, i know that i will have my fellow aspiring physiotherapists alongside me, merry christmas(:

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